CYNTHIA BEARD: LIKE A BOSS INTERVIEW
You know those people that make you want to be better just by being around them? That is pretty much Cynthia in a nutshell. I met her a few weeks ago in my new co-working office and instantly felt connected to her. Good energy just pours out of her and into everyone around her.
Since then, she has been helping me work through some things that years of therapy and self-help books have only just scratched the surface of. She is the REAL DEAL when it comes to life coaching. And I have been shouting her name from the roof tops because I think every single woman would benefit from having even just a conversation with her.
So naturally, I knew I had to get her on my Like A Boss interview series to pick her brain and share a little more about her, her thoughts on mindset and how that relates to business, and what her process is like when it comes to coaching.
CASEY: Hi Cynthia!! Before we start, tell us a little about yourself and your biz!
CYNTHIA: Thanks for having me on the blog, Casey! Well first… I consider myself a happy and positive human. I love that I get to call Santa Barbara, CA home, I love my partner Dave, my dog Frankie, and our little life that we’ve created less than a mile from the beach. I have great family, friends, jewelry, and bed linens :) And there’s nothing that brings me more joy than finding a truly extraordinary piece of art or trinket from an antique store.
As for my biz… I’m the founder of A Love Styled Life, which I consider both a brand and a movement dedicated to fostering happy and aligned, highly influential women.
The work I do intersects the spiritual, energetic, and human worlds, and centers around leveraging our energy to honor, support, and create lives that feel good and change the world. I love this work so much, and I truly feel my purpose in life is to help women get back in touch with their truth… which all started for me when I realized at 30 years old that, despite numerous achievements and accolades, I had no idea who I truly was (or who I wanted to be). It’s that journey through self discovery that led to the start of my business, and has instigated the path to transformation for hundreds of women.
CASEY: So, from there, how did you get into life coaching?
CYNTHIA: Great question! Well, I’ve always been a pretty curious and spiritual person all my life. I’ve also always been interested in people, their stories, and what makes them tick. I was involved with youth groups, and spiritual leadership through school… and then when I got to college, I started to explore different modalities and spiritual traditions.
For most of my life I felt different, out of place, and alone. I was adopted into an extremely loving family at birth, and had a pretty typical and awesome childhood. But for most of my life, on the inside, I felt different and alone. My interests and perspectives were so far off from everyone in my family and my school… and I didn’t quite know what to do with that. So I tried being a different person to different people in an effort to connect, and gradually lost any true connection with myself along the way as a result. I made myself wrong for everything I did, even the things that should have made me proud, because I didn’t feel a sense of love for myself at all.
It took a break down at 30, followed by the death of my mother, for me to wake up and realize that I was the only thing that could make myself happy. I also realized I wasn’t guaranteed anything… especially time… and so I had this very visceral sense of passion for living life to the fullest in the most authentic and true way I possibly could.
CASEY: Being that I work mostly with women owned or women centered businesses, can you share a little about how you think mindset affects our success, specifically for women?
CYNTHIA: Well mindset is the primary operating system of life, so I believe it to fundamentally influence and affect success (or anything for that matter). How you think, feel, believe, and perceive anything that you come into contact with WILL shape how you react to that thing (and by reacting, I mean both in literal action as well as in the meaning you make of it and how you communicate it).It’s similar to those stories you hear of people who share completely different accounts of what happened after witnessing the very same accident, from the very same place, at the very same time. Who we are and what we believe completely shapes the meaning we make of our experiences and the subsequent actions we take as a result.
And yes, our mindset absolutely affects success. It shapes it, defines it, and either allows it or doesn’t. But for women in general, the actual act of defining success is complicated. Most of us aren’t taught or even given the permission to define what that truly means for us individually until we get to a crisis point in life. In most cases, that crisis point comes from a tragic event like a major illness or accident… or simply with physical or emotional burnout from feeling overwhelmed, frustrated, and/or bitter from all the different definitions of success we’re trying to keep up with. Our natural tendency is to look outside ourselves for an appropriate definition of success. And as women, we generally tend to feel a pressure to take on them all. But the reality is… we get to define success in any way that we dream and desire it to be.
CASEY: Can you share 3 things that we can start doing right away to shift our thought patterns?
1. Take 100% responsibility for everything that you’re feeling and experiencing in your life. 100%. Not 95% or 50%... 100%. This is often the hardest most important thing to do when trying to change our experiences because it’s normal in our culture to be in a drama state and find the cause of our problem(s) in everything outside of ourselves. Just look to our media and political scene right now (on all sides of the aisle). BUT… the only true thing we can control in our lives is US. Truly. The only thing we have complete and absolute control over is how we think/feel/believe/perceive/and act. The only thing. Take 100% responsibility for that. And take 100% responsibility for everything that happens as a result. You are the cause, and you are also the solution. Taking 100% responsibility as the cause is the only lasting way to change anything.
2. Create your own definition of success (and not just in your business or career, but also with the personal relationship you have with yourself, your body, your lifestyle, as well as the other relationships you have with the people in your life). Unless you have your own bespoke definitions of success (and for that matter, happiness), you’re more than likely going to burn out in trying to live up to the definition that somebody else has created.
3. Become self aware. Tune in to yourself. Check-in on how you feel and allow yourself to feel it. Recognize and notate what’s working and not working in your life and your business. Don’t be afraid to admit the things you’ve been avoiding. And by all means, check-in on your self talk. How you speak to yourself and about yourself on the inside IS supporting and commanding what you’ll experience on the outside. Any transformation or change you want to make starts FIRST with becoming aware of this, in addition to what’s working and not working. Stop trying to hide how you’re feeling… let it out and into the light for healing.
CASEY: Any books, podcasts, or resources that you recommend our readers get started with?
READ: The book that made the biggest impact for me when I first started diving into these principles was The Game of Life and How To Play it by Florence Shovel Shinn. It uses Christian terminology (as that was the time and place for Florence), but she does a brilliant job of speaking to thoughts/beliefs/feelings and energetic perspectives… and how these things literally shape your life.
LISTEN: Paige Filiator of Playing the Field podcast does an amazing 3 part series introducing Human Design, that began my own exploratory journey into studying the modality. Look for episodes two, three, and four.
Others podcasts that speak energy and manifestation/business include: And She Rises by Amanda Frances, The Lexi Show with Lexi DiAngelo, & The Successful Mind Podcast with David Naegle.
CASEY: So many great resources! Tell us a little more about your process with coaching.
Absolutely! Every person is unique, so every 1:1 private coaching experience is going to look and feel slightly different. That being said, the consistent framework we address is: know yourself, love yourself, and live yourself.
Knowing yourself starts with the situation in life that brought your to our work… what’s working, not working, etc. It’s heavily feeling based, so we get right to how you’re feeling in any specific area of your life/business. We also immediately address your Human Design, which is the natural way in which your aura and energy are meant to communicate and operate within the world. Every single person’s HD is different, so we take a look at this immediately, and begin to incorporate what will be the most aligned way for you to operate in making decisions and communicating with yourself and others right away. From there, we move in to how you desire to feel and be, and begin incorporating this into your presence and actions in everyday life.
My role is to help guide you in staying the course and staying focused on where you’re going… addressing both the conscious and subconscious thoughts/feelings/beliefs that arise along the way. My gift through this entire process is being able to interpret what you’re communicating energetically, and translate how this is being expressed so that you know (and can subsequently choose to change) the true cause of what you’re experiencing in your life.
CASEY: And because I ask every Boss in this interview series - give us 3 things people wouldn’t know about you from social media!
CYNTHIA: Yikes! Well…
I have a slight obsession with bedding textiles and pillows. Like a serious addiction. I could spend hours pinning bedding layouts and designs, and frequent local Santa Barbara stores like Diani Living just to be amongst beautiful bedding things. Here’s the thing… the bed is where you rest and rejuvenate to do all-the-things. So why not make it look and feel like the most beautiful place in the world? ** oh and in case you were wondering, I make and style our bed every morning.
I love musicals, and will forever consider musicals to be the best music for cleaning house on a Saturday morning. I still remember the look on my boyfriends face after we first moved in, when he came home from running errands and I was blasting Godspell while dancing about the kitchen and cleaning dishes.
I was 16 years old when I traveled abroad to Europe for the very first time. I went as part of a school sponsored trip over spring break with my best friends, and we toured Germany, Austria, Switzerland, and Lichenstein. It was, and still remains, the best trip I’ve ever taken in my life. This experience is where I realized that I was meant to travel… and that traveling was going to be my deepest passion and love. I never feel as truly connected with myself as I do when I’m traveling (and especially when I’m travelling in Europe). My best friend from high school (who was also on this trip) just moved with her husband and daughter to Amsterdam. So needless to say, I’m looking forward to a few European adventures in my near future!
Thank you so much for sharing!! If you think you might benefit from working with Cynthia (trust me, we ALL would!), please reach out to her with any questions!